Archive for December, 2006

More is Less

30 December 2006

Can I get a whoop-whoop from the other Floyd fans in the audience?

No? Fuck you.

So, yeah, if you’re a Pink Floyd nut, like myself, you’ve probably listened to their album More. And you probably thought it was sweet as hell if you like their wacky shit, or you stopped listening after you realized it wasn’t like The Wall. Right?

So, maybe the fact that the album More is a soundtrack for a movie of the same name has passed into your knowledge base. Maybe you thought about acting on it. Let me provide you with a quick checklist to see if you’re ready.

Do you enjoy the more random music of Pink Floyd?
Do you enjoy seeing European people getting high and fucking?
Do you want to see Mimsy Farmer’s tits?
Do you want to see Klaus Grünberg’s cock?
Do you want to see Mimsy Farmer’s tits while she dances in front of a windmill while you worry that Klaus Grünberg will show you his cock again?

If you answered yes to any of the above questions, More might be for you. Granted, Mimsy’s breasts can hardly be labeled such. I think I have larger man-boobs on my bad days. But, boobs they are and I salute their appearance. Time and time again. I think there’s almost a good forty-five minutes of footage in this film of her melons.

The movie is basically a “Hey kids, lets get high and have a good time!” film for the first half or so, but the second half is damn haunting. Damn fucking haunting.

I don’t want to spoil it for anyone, but if you want to see an interesting take from the sixties on the ups and downs of drug use, this film delivers.

And the soundtrack is fuck-all awesome.

Red Steel: Through Shit, I Have Hope

25 December 2006

Red Steel for the Wii isn’t very good.

(more…)

I Knew My Studies Would Come In Handy…

21 December 2006

Red Scarlet, known on the interwebs for her ass kicking of Super Metroid, tends to show me cool things from time to time. Well, apparently, she read you could beat Dragon Quest 2 (Super Famicom remake) without the second prince. So she did. And had me translate the little blurbs of dialog they added into the game for beating it without him. Nifty!

You can find the info here.

Glad I’m using my Japanese for something these days, haha!

But seriously, little things like this in games are why I’m starting to fall in love with old games again. Not necessarily the ‘nostalgia’ factor. But rather, secrets are still being found in old games, new ways of doing things, and the rewards are simply finding these things, nothing more.

I like that.

Kicking it de la old school

20 December 2006

Just finished Phantasy Star.

“Universe?” No. “Online?” Nope! “The fucking 1988 game?” Yep!

Interesting tidbit - the original Phantasy Star came out in Japan only two days after the original Final Fantasy and a good year and a half after the original Dragon Quest. But it was the first of the three to hit the States.

So how does it hold up? It felt as a decent mixture of DQ and FF parts, but on the whole a little lacking. A poor interface, even by 8-bit standards, makes it a bit clumsy to play. I think DQ has a better atmosphere and FF handles the 4 character party dynamics a bit better. But overall, a solid 8-bit RPG.

Now I’m going to swing onto the sequel. Let’s see if it really holds up as much as people rave on about it.

I Think I Just Crapped Myself a Little

12 December 2006

Dragon Quest IX is a DS game.

I thought this was pretty damn keen. Portable DQ! And a game I haven’t played before. AWESOME!

Dragon Quest IX is an action RPG.

Buh? My turn based battles!

I’m not so much bothered that DQ9 is an action RPG other than my favorite part of the whole RPG genre is starting to fall by the wayside. Final Fantasy 12 was, and I’m still coming to terms with my actual feelings, little short of a disaster. Going in, I knew it wasn’t going to be what I wanted in a Final Fantasy game, but even then I got less than I hoped fore since I didn’t even really enjoy myself.

It’s akin to one’s favorite fruit going out of season, but then finding it shall never bloom again. I am, although, lucky that I can return to the original games that I do enjoy and replay them. But they never do again have that first play sweetness that is not unlike one’s first high off a drug.

So is that my main objection? Perhaps. I can’t say that with my wide array of tastes in RPGs that I’m adverse to change or options. But I am saddened to lose that which I do enjoy.

Oh well, I just hope SMT4 isn’t an action game!

There’s Something About Linearity

10 December 2006

Portrait of Ruin, the new Castlvania game, is fucking great. Dual character system allows for interesting puzzles and boss strategies. Segmented level design allows for some interesting locals while staying true to the game-play mechanics I’ve grown to love. And, surprisingly, some actually difficulty in a Castlevania game for the first time in years. A really great game. Don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise.

But they’ll try.

In your travels along the bowels of the internet idiot barrel, you may come across some some who bitch about the music, say the stage design sucks or somewhat. Then you’ll get some fools who throw out the insult that the game is “too linear.”

’squeeze me? (Oh, please baby.)

I have trouble calling a game linear when it gives me two options to move upon entering a room, and both lead different, long winding paths that I can retreat upon and try another if I decide.

Okay, but yes, there is one “main story” arc that you have to follow in a linear order to complete the game. Goddamn bureaucrats tellin’ me how ta play mah damn games!

But then the game dares to offer you quests, little side missions filled with objectives ranging from “find this item” to “master this skill”. Tasks that can range from a few seconds if you’ve happened to already complete it by chance (such as killing x number of monsters throughout the game) or a few hours if you can’t remember where that damn thing you swear you saw in this corner of the map but where the hell is it now. Fun stuff.

Anyway, this got me thinking. Since when is linearity bad, anyway?

Historians would probably point you to Grand Theft Auto 3, otherwise known as “when people started giving a shit about the GTA series”. But non-linear games have been available ever since people wanted to bring their Dungeons and Dragons adventures to the computing world. And no, I don’t recall any school yard bitchings about our adventures in video game land being too straight line based. We were too busy complaining about the Technodrome being too fucking hard to beat. So what’s the deal?

I don’t really know if I have an answer, unfortunately. If I had to guess, I’d link it to people wanting choices (and who doesn’t?) and feeling this game doesn’t give them the choices they’d like to see. Then again, I’ve been reading some stuff on how limited choices actually makes people happier, in some regards. So that might explain why my hobby of choice is filled with bitter fucks!

Mmm, how’s that for awkward. Me without a solid opinion.

New hat!

3 December 2006

Personal note:
Humping the corner of a scenic elevator while descending is one of the stranger feelings I’ve encountered in my days.

Anyway, the JLPT is over, and I’m fairly sure I didn’t do well. Might want to try that studying thing sometime.

Regardless, Toronto is still how I’ve always known it. Cold. Filled with beer and mediocre wings. And finer restaurants than in my current location! And nice people! The couple next to us at the Korean BBQ place offered us some of their extra tender meats, and we couldn’t even finish it all.

And I felt up some milk bags.

“Oh, rk, you devilish fiend! You took advantage of the touching rule at a strip club!”

Not so! It was actually plastic bags containing milk, on sale in a local grocers! It scared me! The feel of it was unnatural and questionable at best! I had heard legends of these things, but face to face with the cold, white beasts is another matter unto itself.

Oh, and new hat! I’ve been looking for a hat that would suit me proper, and behold!

In sepia to further show the sexy.